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The counsellor can wait up to 2 minutes. They have been waiting:. Concerned about confidentiality? Why not ask the counsellor you chat to about this? Please stay on our website so that you know when a counsellor is ready. You can check out other Childline s, videos and games while you wait. Friends can be there to enjoy the best times, and they can help us when we're feeling down. But sometimes friendships have problems. It can be hard to know what to do, but we've got some advice to help.
Sometimes you might not like someone when you first meet them. But you might find that as time goes on you start to like them more. Try not to judge someone before getting to know them.The science of friendship - Lydia Denworth
If you give them a chance, you might just become friends. We can't choose how we feel, but we can choose how we act.
So if there's someone in your group who you don't like, it's important to make sure you're not nasty to them. You can get along with someone and hang out in the same group as them without being really close friends. You'll make lots of different kinds of friends in your life. Some friends you'll only know for a summer or an after school class. And some you might know for your whole life.
It's natural for some friends to drift apart. And this is more likely to happen if you and a friend go to a different secondary school or college. Friendships are normally best when they aren't forced. If there's a friend that you feel you're naturally growing away from, that's okay. You might not have the same interests anymore, and you might make new friends somewhere else. If you've fallen out with a friend, it can make you feel lonely or lose confidence. Read our top tips for making friends and how to build your self-esteem. Sometimes friends fall out for so long that it's hard to remember why they argued in the first place.
It's really frustrating to feel stuck in the middle. It's important to be honest with your friends. Tell them that you know they are having problems with each other, but you don't want that to affect your friendship with either of them. It's also a good idea to tell them that you don't want to pick sides. You can say how you feel without being rude.
Find out more about being assertive. Feeling left out?
Get support. If your friend has said something about how you look or where you come fromor pressured you into doing something you didn't want to, it could be a good idea to tell someone what's happened. Sometimes in a group of friends it can be hard to tell what's 'just a joke' or 'banter' and what's bullying.
Are the jokes always aimed at you, or do different people in the group get teased sometimes too? If the jokes are always about you personally for example, about your appearance, intelligence, sexuality, race or religion then this is not okay. This could be bullying or emotional abuse and your friends shouldn't be doing it. Talk to a friend you trust Try talking to one of your friends when you're alone with them - they might act differently on their own. If there's someone you trust in your group you could explain how the bullying or jokes make you feel. You could ask them to not in if it happens again.
Get more advice on how to cope with bullying. Romantic relationships sometimes start with two people being friends. If you get along well and have fun together, sometimes this naturally grows into something more than friendship. However, it's normal to worry that they don't feel the same way, or that telling them might change your friendship. It can be really confusing when friendships change.
And it can be hard to understand how we feel. If a friend tells you they fancy you, it can be a big shock. It's natural to worry that this might change the friendship. But there are things that can help:. Sometimes things in life change which can mean we don't get to see our friends as much as we used to. You might be moving to a different school or college, or your family might be moving house.
This could mean you don't get to see your friends as much. Think about your close friends. At one point, you weren't friends with them and you had to get to know them for the first time. If you start a new school, there will be people there who you don't know — but you might become really good friends with them. Read tips for making new friends.
Thanks for giving us feedback! We always love to hear what you think, and we make changes to improve Childline based on the things you tell us. Friends are different from people like family or classmates, because you choose who you're friends with, and they choose you. Sometimes we need someone to have fun with. But now and again we need a friend to support us through a tough time.
Friends should never:. Sometimes friends fall out. Usually they make up again soon, but arguments can sometimes be more serious. If this has happened to you, read our advice below. REAL friends just get me. the message boards. You haven't used the Childline website for a while. To protect your privacy we'll log you out soon. If you're waiting for a chat or in the middle of writing or drawing something, click on the "keep me logged in" button. Go to chat.
Online chat: 0 mins 0 secs You are talking to a counsellor. Thanks for waiting. Welcome to your chat. Exit chat. Chat ready: please press 'Go to chat' and your counsellor will be there The counsellor can wait up to 2 minutes. They have been waiting: Concerned about confidentiality? You are now in the waiting room. Site search Search box Search. Friendships Friends can be there to enjoy the best times, and they can help us when we're feeling down.
On this Falling out with friends Saying goodbye to friends or school Being bullied by friends Fancying a friend Missing a friend. Drifting apart from friends You'll make lots of different kinds of friends in your life. Being stuck in the middle Sometimes friends fall out for so long that it's hard to remember why they argued in the first place.
Writing letters to the teachers you liked Teachers can have a big effect on us, and it can be tough not being able to say thank you. Try writing letters or s to the teachers that meant the most to you. You could talk to someone you trustpost anonymously on the message boards or write about it privately using our mood journal. It's good to talk.
If your friend has made you feel bad: try to think about why they might have acted the way they did ask if they're ok - they might have felt worried about something, and taken it out on you be assertive - this can make it easier to say how you feel.
If you've made a friend feel bad: be prepared to say sorry give them time ask another friend or maybe even a teacher to explain how you feel to them. If you need advice, you can talk to us. Remember: It's not okay for someone to make you feel bad.
Bounce back from bullying Being bullied can make you feel like things can never get better, but we've got a tool to help. Feeling hurt? Learn how to tell someone you trust what's going on. Why not try: getting someone else's opinion Ask someone you trust what they think about what's going on.
If your friend fancies you It can be really confusing when friendships change. But there are things that can help: talk to someone. It can really help to talk to someone you trust about how this has made you feel and what you can do next give them some space. It can be really hard to distance yourself, especially if they're a close friend.
But it might help them to work out their feelings and whether they can be just friends be honest with them. Once you've worked out how you feel, try talking to them honestly about how you feel. Think about ways you can stay in touch with your friends. You could: keep their phone so you can contact each other make friends on social media arrange to meet up in the future. Making new friends When things change, remember that this can also be a good opportunity to make new friends. Mood journal Keep track of how you're feeling and why, it's a great way to let your feelings out.
Friendship Quiz. Feedback Form Was this useful? If so, tell us more. Feedback Send feedback Thanks for giving us feedback! Friends should never: put you down make fun of you, your religion, sexuality or culture put you in danger or make you feel unsafe. Friends should: support you, even if you're not up to talking listen to you when you need to talk help you if they can include you in what they're doing compliment you and make you feel good respect you, your religion, culture and sexuality.
Advice about helping a friend If you're worried about a friend, we can help. Peer pressure Get help making your own choices.Looking for advice friendship
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